January 15, 2007

People from work are coming over, a HOWTO brought to you by the most tormented part of my mind.

First, let's list our goals as we think through the fact that our current boss, our potential future boss, and many people that I work with day-to-day are coming over to my house and will witness this mess that is my life when I get busy.

Impressions that I plan to give these coworkers:

1. I am a genius, my potential only barely tapped - I have books about shit that they have never heard of that are insanely complicated and must enhance my abilities at work being as pedestrian as work must seem to such a great mind.

2. I have a complete home office that must have been built from the ground up for working long house for our shared employer. I am dedicated, a workhorse with a bottomless reserve of energy and initiative.

3. The home office also appears to be used for other, non-shared-employer work. I am valuable on the market - a hot commodity recognized by all those that have work with me. I am a consultant for hire with many more small experiences bringing ideas to life that make my opinion at work seem much more wise that the 3 previous employers listed on my resume.

4. I am pleasant outside of work and you want me to be your friend. The bond from this party will never be broken by petty office politics.

5. I have a rich home-life, my wife is lovely and awe-inspiring and I should never have to work late ever again.

January 15, 2007 05:23 AM